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Reconciliation

Author: Scott

~ 11/05/09

Clayton Imoo, our friend from north of the 49th parallel (that is a mystical, magical land known as Canada to those who love curling and ice hockey), recently posted this article on his blog and graciously gave permission to reprint.  It will be published in the next issue of Celebrate!

Please note that there is an actual plea for comments at the end of this post.  Let’s all help each other here!

For many teens, it’s an answer to the question “What about the Catholic faith do you appreciate?”

It’s also an answer for many teens to the question “What part of our faith do you not understand or practice?”

Therein lies the beauty and complexity of the Sacrament of Reconciliation; teens can easily name it as one of the seven, yet many of them don’t frequent it regularly for various reasons: i.e. they find it intimidating, they’re not sure what to confess, or they don’t understand why they need to go to a priest instead of directly to God for forgiveness.

Reconciliationq In Vancouver, BC, the archdiocesan Youth Ministry Office (YMO) has been holding youth reconciliation events for the past ten years in order to make the sacrament more accessible and less intimidating for youth. The event, called FREEDOM, began in 1999 and has since grown into one of the YMO’s biggest and most powerful events. Since its infancy, FREEDOM has seen close to 5,000 youth and young adult participants gather to experience the healing power of Christ.

Msgr. Mark Hagemoen, Episcopal Vicar for Pastoral Services, created the vision for the inaugural FREEDOM event in 1999 as the then-Director of the YMO. “FREEDOM was inspired by the Year of Forgiveness for the universal Catholic Church as we were preparing for the Jubilee Year. And because it was held on the Friday of Thanksgiving weekend, it was a perfect opportunity for the young people of the archdiocese to gather together and give thanks to God for His love and forgiveness.” (The YMO has since moved FREEDOM to the spring so it falls within the season of Lent.)

At the event, teens are prepared for confession through a dynamic program including skits, music, prayer, testimonies, teachings, and examination of conscience. The Archbishop of Vancouver is almost always present, along with over two dozen priests.

FREEDOM encourages youth to receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation, and not to be afraid of it. Raymond, a youth from St. Joseph the Worker Parish in Richmond, says: “FREEDOM is a really significant event for me. The leaders and program set the perfect mood to prepare me for reconciliation and make me comfortable to confess my sins.”

FREEDOM’s popularity has spread throughout North America, with a few dioceses modeling their reconciliation services after the event.

FREEDOM incorporates many elements into its seamless four-hour long program. Like any reconciliation event for youth, its aim is to create an environment where youth are encouraged to receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation. Irrespective of the scope and size of the event (diocesan, school, parish, or retreat), here are seven principles in planning an effective reconciliation event for youth:

reconciliation 1. Make the Sacrament non-intimidating (without watering it down). Confession scares many teens (and adults too!). Thus, it’s vital to create a loving and affirming atmosphere and make it a place of trust. For some young people, it’s an issue of ignorance…they simply don’t understand the theology behind the sacrament. Ensure that there is some catechesis for them, and don’t be afraid to have some fun with it. This can be accomplished through light-hearted skits and presentations.

2. Create a prayerful environment. To provide a safe and comfortable atmosphere, you can do many things with the environment that will help set the proper tone. Simple decorations, plants, candles, and music (more on music below) will help foster a warm setting, one that will hopefully encourage the youth to receive the sacrament.

3. Pay attention to how the confession stations are set up. Explain to the participants that they will have the option of going to confession anonymously or sitting face-to-face with the priest. Each confession station could have three chairs: one for the priest, one facing the priest, and one at a right-angle to the priest (off one of his shoulders). While the priest will obviously remain stationary, teens will have the choice of two chairs to sit in, depending on their comfort level.

4. Music is key. Pick appropriate songs and pick a worship leader who understands the flow of what you are trying to accomplish. We begin FREEDOM with 30 minutes of worship music, and then have the worship team provide “background music” throughout the confession time. We have them lead another 20-30 minutes of music at the end of the event before the participants leave.

5. Give options for after confession. Plan a few things for teens to do once they’ve gone to confession and completed their penance. We’ve invited prayer teams to pray with participants throughout the evening. As well, we provide light refreshments in another part of the church for some quiet social time. These provide some nice alternatives to those who don’t choose to stay to pray with the music ministry. It’s important to recognize that some teens may not even receive the sacrament, so there needs to be activities for them.

6. End in celebration. The send-off is just as important as the gathering time. Once the majority of participants have gone to confession, consider having a youth or young adult share a testimony about the freedom they experienced from receiving the Sacrament. Then, have the music ministry end with a few songs of praise and celebration so the youth go home happy!

7. Invite plenty of priests. From a practical standpoint, the more priests that are present, the less time it will take for all participants to go to confession. It is a tremendous witness to the young people to see so many priests coming and supporting them by administering the Sacrament. Do your best to secure RSVPs from the priests, so you know how many confession stations to prepare, give or take a few.

FREEDOM’s impact is not limited to teens and young adults: it affects the participating priests as well. Father James Hughes of St. Ann’s Parish in Abbotsford is a FREEDOM mainstay, and cites the event’s importance and relevance as a main reason for being involved: “It is such an inspirational event. It truly brings joy and fulfillment in my priesthood to be part of such a gathering.”

The bottom line is that youth reconciliation events are an excellent way for youth to reconcile themselves with God, with themselves, and with each other.

Clay is right on with #4 – Music is key.  Recognizing that live music is not always available… what is on your mix cd for a young people’s celebration of the Sacrament of Reconciliation.  Please, please, please comment away.  Include title and artist!

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9 Comments »

  1. What a brilliant article. Thank you for posting it.

    I think that as youth ministers there is so much more we can do with reconciliation that we often don’t explore. Too often we subscribe to the mindset that we can do without it or to the mindset that it has to be ultra-traditional. Neither is correct. Modern methods of youth ministry offer us the chance to be orthodox, while still incarnational in how we minister – by making the concepts relevent to the lives of our Young People.

    When I worked in a youth centre in the North (of England) we used to do quite powerful rec services. We had 50 Young People and one or two priests. We started the serice with a brief liturgy of the word and an examination of conscience, explaining the sacrament and the need for it as we did. We then played loud music and the priests sat on stools at the front and put on their stolls. The loud music had two purposes: firstly it ensured privacy to those confessing and secondly it set an atmosphere. It was very powerful. We tried to find music with no breaks or dips so that the odd (crucial) word wouldn’t drift from the penitent’s mouth around the Chapel during a quiet moment. Adiemus and the theme from The Mission were particularly good.

    The rule was that everybody had to go up to a priest (these were school retreats) but they had the choice of either going for the Sacrament of for a blessing. The priests were asked to make their blessings extra long and their confessions short (Act of Contrition and penance were done together before and after the sacrament) so that those watching wouldn’t know which option each person had chosen.

    It could take a while, but it was powerful. I remember the first time I saw it done. The loud music started and the two priests confessed to each other before the young people cameup. I was really moved by it.

    I think the FREEDOM model is a brilliant one. I might talk to my diocesan youth officer about trying it here.

    Comment by Jack Regan — Thursday, November 5, 2009 @ 7:20 am

  2. This is awesome. I hope more people comment. I often struggle about music selection. You want something kind of ambient, no dynamics, no highs no lows with about 90 minutes of music you could just shuffle and have it work whenever. Classical type music or a soundtracks as Jack commented is a good idea, but even a soundtrack includes action or tension some times. You really need to listen to the whole thing before playing it. Happened to me once, deep in the soundtrack, heavy drums come up…real mood breaker.

    I’ve been trying to develop a play list for reconciliation. Here’s what’s on it so far, with a few others, but It’s still not great. These songs are at the heart. There is still a fluctuation in some dynamics between songs.

    Lord you have my heart – Delirious
    Surely we can change – David Crowder Band
    Only Alive – Jars of clay
    What a friend I’ve found – Delirious
    Fragrance Prayer – Tom Booth
    Shelter your name – Danielle Rose
    No Greater Love – Danielle Rose
    Prayer of the Penitent – Rock S.A.L.T. (indie: current website not active, I’ll comment again when I get it)
    Great Song!

    Comment by Dean Diomedes — Thursday, November 5, 2009 @ 5:36 pm

  3. Songs:
    I’m not that good at this but how ’bout
    Matt Maher – Lay it Down and Empty and Beautiful
    Aaron Shust – Rest in the Arms
    Brandon Heath – Love Never Fails
    Chris Rice – Love is Gonna Break Through
    Third Day – I Don’t Know and You Are Mine
    Ginny Owens – Free

    Comment by Jodi Mott — Thursday, November 5, 2009 @ 6:03 pm

  4. Rock S.A.L.T. is on Facebook search: “Rock S.A.L.T.”

    Comment by Dean Diomedes — Thursday, November 5, 2009 @ 6:21 pm

  5. Any setting of Ps. 103 or Ps. 51; “Here I Am” by Tom Booth; “Were I the Perfect Child of God” by Tony Alonso; “Hold Us, Jesus” by Chris de Silva;

    Don’t forget about hymns of praise and thanksgiving on the flip side of reconciliation!

    Comment by Orin — Thursday, November 5, 2009 @ 8:07 pm

  6. Answer Me- Ed Bolduc
    Awake, O Sleeper- Ike Ndolo
    Be With Me, Lord -Sarah Hart/Curtis Stephan
    Better Days -Goo Goo Dolls
    Blackbird -(performed by)Sarah McLachlan
    Prayer of St. Francis – Popple
    Breakable- Ingrid Michaelson
    Come To Jesus -Mindy Smith
    The Emptiest Day- Caedmon’s Call
    Find Yourself -Brad Paisley
    Fix You - Coldplay
    Give Us Clean Hands -Chris Tomlin
    Have a Little Faith– Michael Franti & Spearhead
    Healing Hands- J. Blakesley
    Holding Back -Dougie Maclean
    I’ll Remember - Madonna
    I’ll Stand By You -Pretenders
    I Know I’m Not Alone – Michael Franti & Spearhead
    Lay It Down- Matt Maher
    Let It Be Me- Ray LaMontagne
    Letting Go -Matt Maher
    Miracle of Grace – Curtis Stephan
    More - Cheer Up Charlie
    More Than Sorry - Ben Harper
    Move Along (Acoustic Version) -The All-American Rejects
    Mystery Of Mercy -Caedmon’s Call
    On Fire - Switchfoot
    On The Willows - Godspell Soundtrack
    Porcelain Heart -BarlowGirl
    The Rivers of Babylon- Matt Maher
    Sacred Silence - Jenny Pixler
    Solitude Song (Follow Me) -Tom Booth
    Swan Song - Bruce Hornsby
    Sweet Redeemer - Steve Angrisano
    There Is a River -Jars of Clay
    Unashamed Love - Ten Shekel Shirt
    Unless A Grain Of Wheat - John Angotti
    What Light – Wilco
    When God Ran – Craig & Dean Phillips
    Yahweh - U2

    Comment by Cassandra — Thursday, November 5, 2009 @ 9:52 pm

  7. Great post Clayton!

    Comment by Roy Petitfils — Thursday, November 5, 2009 @ 10:21 pm

  8. I created many playlists for my iPod with songs for reconciliation, skits, prayer services, peppy songs, and other youth ministry situations I’ve found myself in without live music in the past. This particular list is one of three that I’ve created for reconciliation. I try to update the lists each year. Makes it nice for any reconciliation service to just press play and not worry about the music for an hour or two so I can pay more attention to other things like people. Great post, Clayton. Thanks for re-posting, Scott. I agree. Music is key. Great resource to share!

    Everything – Lifehouse
    How Could You Say No? -Steve Angrisano
    Sacred Silence – Jenny Pixler
    Hold Me, Jesus – Kerry Patric Clark
    Amazing Grace (My Chains Are Gone) – Chris Tomlin
    Empty and Beautiful – Matt Maher
    Our Father (Prayer Chant) – Who Do You Say I Am?
    Veni, Creator Spiritus – John Angotti
    Somebody’s Prayin’ – Kerry Patric Clark
    When Love Takes You In – Steven Curtis Chapman
    Daniel’s Heart – Steve Angrisano
    He’s Not On His Knees Yet – Cece Wayans
    Will I Lose My Dignity? – Rent
    How Beautiful – Twila Paris
    Don’t Give Up – Peter Gabriel
    The Invitation – Steven Curtis Chapman
    Broken Things / You Can Have My Heart
    Empty Me – Chris Sligh
    Here I Am to Worship – Phillips, Craig & Dean
    Angels Are Watching Over Me – Kerry Patric Clark
    Open My Eyes – Jesse Manibusan
    How You Live – Point Of Grace
    Who Am I – Casting Crowns
    Have a Little Faith In Me – Unknown
    King Of The Hill – eLi
    Things I Prayed For – eLi
    Unanswered Prayers – Garth Brooks
    Love, Serve & Remember – John Astin
    Enya
    I Am – Nichole Nordeman
    All In All – Unknown
    You Raise Me Up – Josh Groban
    Fix You – Coldplay

    Comment by Katie Cornell — Thursday, November 5, 2009 @ 10:56 pm

  9. A truly helpful website, thanks!

    Comment by jesus t shirt — Monday, January 18, 2010 @ 11:44 pm

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