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Doing Youth Ministry All Wrong

Author: Scott

~ 02/03/10

nm_youth_church_090506_mn Tim Schmoyer over in his Life in Student Ministry blog pondered that he has been thinking that he’s doing youth ministry all wrong.  I’m re-posting a significant portion here because this is where my heart has been for the last few weeks and Tim was able to put it all into words faster than I could…

Despite knowing otherwise in my head, the way I actually lead my church’s youth ministry is mostly from the mentality that our youth ministry is a program or service we provide to families. It’s almost like I’m unintentionally feeding the consumeristic perspective by sometimes using language like, “We offer small groups…” and, “We provide connection points for your teens…” Since when was ministry ever supposed to be about what a paid staff member and a couple adult volunteers are expected to spiritually provide for teens and families?

Youth ministry should not be about how the church can serve the youth or even how we can provide programs that help them grow spiritually. That’s the parents’ responsibility. In fact, I don’t think youth ministry should even accidentally enable parents to outsource their God-given responsibility to us, something I know my ministry is all too guilty of. Support parents, yes, but enable them to outsource? No.

The Greek word for “church” is literally “ekklesia,” a community of believers who are “called out” to serve and edify each other and the people around them.

Instead of fueling the consumerism mentality of what a church “offers” or “provides” and which church in town does it best, youth ministry should probably be about helping teens use their God-given gifts to serve the body. It should teach families that youth ministry isn’t just about what the church does for them, but that they are “called out” to think beyond themselves with a servant’s heart. I bet teen church drop-outs would decrease if they actually served as a valuable and essential part of the local body of Christ.

Please read all of Tim’s post. It all comes down to the perspective of “Ask not what the church can do for young people, but ask what young people can do with and for the church.”  And, always remember that the church is the whole body of Christ not just the few adults with maybe a professional staffer off in an obscure corner of the church

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11 Comments

  1. So in his blog (thanks for the link) Tim says, “Should youth ministry be more about providing a service or creating servants?”. Yes, I agree with this, I think it’s a shift in perspective, slight perhaps, but crucial. It is in keeping with these two goals:

    “Goal 1: To empower young people to live as disciples of Jesus Christ in our world today.
    Goal 2: To draw young people to responsible participation in the life, mission, and work of the Catholic faith community.”RTV http://www.usccb.org/laity/youth/rtvcontents.shtml

    Youth Ministry is not about offering something (programs) TO them but rather it is about offering young people and families the opportunity to Become Something – Servants and Disciples to the Almighty.

    Comment by Barb Legere — Wednesday, February 3, 2010 @ 6:41 am

  2. Absolutely, Barb….

    But those servants and discipleship to the Almighty should be finding “their place” within the contect of the whole Catholic Christian community and not just within age segregated programs… So, I really have been wondering, how well dowe live up to the vision of drawing young people to responsible participation in the life, mission, and work of the Catholic faith community.

    I’ve been thinking that this towards what Mark Oestricher, in part, was alluding in his Youth Ministry 3.0 http://www.dscottmiller.com/2009/10/21/youth-ministry-3-0/ He was thinking small community, I believe, but it could/ should be applied within the whole church as well.

    Comment by Scott — Wednesday, February 3, 2010 @ 8:42 am

  3. Social comments and analytics for this post…

    This post was mentioned on Twitter by CatholicYMBlog: Hate to ask it. . . but have we been doing Catholic Youth Ministry all wrong??? http://bit.ly/b1qvSX...

    Trackback by uberVU - social comments — Wednesday, February 3, 2010 @ 1:04 pm

  4. “it could/ should be applied within the whole church as well.” Yes, because our larger communities must be broken down into smaller groupings, small chrisitian communities and I think this is the point of “drawing them into responsibile participation.” We wrestle between all the things we do differently “Youth” meetings, “Youth” service projects, “Youth” conferences, etc. and involving young people in the everyday life of the parish. My young people don’t really see a place for themselves in the St Boniface Men’s Club but that’s OK. We’ll still be doing a service project with them on Sunday helping folks at the Nursing Home get to Mass.

    I think there’s two pieces: programing that is effective and youth-culture savvy that addresses the spiritual needs and concerns of youth AND helping them to find places where they fit within in the Faith Community. My hope has to be that a 7th grader will get to know one of the Men’s Club guys and will have a positive interaction and realize that it may not look like a “Youth” project but that he still feels a connection – communion between them.

    Comment by Barb Legere — Wednesday, February 3, 2010 @ 2:50 pm

  5. I agree with small communities of faith. I also believe in the fact that youth need to be reached in a way that is meaningful to them. Culture, language and ethnicity play a factor when determining what small coummunity of faith they should be invited.

    Comment by Alex Barraza — Wednesday, February 3, 2010 @ 5:54 pm

  6. Creating Youth/Family ministry is more about relationships than programs, more about being the conduit for connecting young people and families to church members AND educating everyone in the parish about Catholc Comprehensive Youth Ministry. However, I find that Youth Ministry Leaders get involved because they love working with youth – not adults. So the question is……are we hiring the wrong people?

    Comment by Sue Versluys — Wednesday, February 3, 2010 @ 9:45 pm

  7. I think Tim’s post is mainly on point. And because I follow your excellent blog daily, I know and appreciate how the Spirit is moving in your heart to integrate young people into the life and heart of our Church. I’m all about that too.

    There will always be a temptation to commoditize programs and events. When we do, there will be those who consume them, outsource to them and at times scapegoat them for not forming their children in the Faith.

    But removing programs, events and even “youth ministry” for the purpose of not enabling parental apathy and laziness, is like taking Twinkies out of Wal Mart because diabetics might buy them.

    As noble as it might be to mainstream kids in an attempt to desegregate Church, I think its potentially harmful. Sure, we need to move in that direction. But let’s not be naïve thinking there’ll be cake and balloons in the vestibule welcoming the active participation of messy, tattooed, pierced and un-sanitized kids. Are we ready for that? Or are we setting our kids up for a showdown at High Noon Mass ending for them in a colossal disappointment.

    I know many young people who have the resources necessary to “find their place” in the Church, I know many more for whom that would be like walking blindfolded through a verdant mine field.

    We should continue to advocate for kids to the boards, pastors and committees that ultimately decide where there place will be. In the meantime we should continue to direct energy toward providing a safe place for them, in and out of Church. A place where they can hear the gospel in a language that makes sense to them. A place where they feel safe to question, to stretch and be supported as they grow in freedom.

    Comment by Roy Petitfils — Thursday, February 4, 2010 @ 12:31 am

  8. I agree with Sue that all ministry must be relational. Have we as Youth Director, Coordinator, etc. built relationships with members of our community outside our current “Core-Team” by having meaningful conversations with them?

    In order to invite our youth into parish life, there must be clear signs of that very life. I see Youth Ministry as a catalyst for growing a vital parish.

    Comment by Greg Sinclair — Thursday, February 4, 2010 @ 12:38 am

  9. The bigger question is… where did you get that picture? Isn’t that from Christ the King Chapel in Steubenville, Ohio? I’ve prayed there a lot, but I’ve never seen a big black question mark there.

    Comment by Bob Rice — Thursday, February 4, 2010 @ 4:45 pm

  10. the picture came from a google search and was placed within this posting from LA’s Free Press. I lifted the picture from the Google Search but the article is of note as well… http://dailyfreep.blogspot.com/2009/05/young-americans-losing-their-religion.html

    Comment by Scott — Thursday, February 4, 2010 @ 7:59 pm

  11. [...] the beginning of the month, there were quite a few comments when we pondered if we were all doing youth ministry all wrong. Kara Powell, of the Fuller Theological Seminary, suggests that our “mistake” might [...]

    Pingback by Catholic Youth Ministry Blog » Youth Ministry = Age Segregation? — Thursday, February 18, 2010 @ 2:02 am

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