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The Catholic YM Blog has been referred to as "the 411 of Catholic Youth Ministry." Your blogger is D. Scott Miller, director of the Division of Youth and Young Adult Ministry for the Archdiocese of Baltimore... Read more...
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This is our third week in crowd-sourcing a new direction in youth ministry. Start here and play along. Previous post: Like I Am a Nobody
It may be a part of the unique wiring of young people’s radar. They are able to gain a sense about adults through observation, and are able to figure who might be “out to get them” or who may actually “get them”. The choice is clear, we should want to “get them” as much as they want to be “gotten”.
The point that is being made is exemplified in the classic movie, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off. It addresses the topic of being understood beautifully. This excerpt occurs between the Dean of Students, Mr. Rooney, and his secretary, Grace.
Rooney: The last thing I need is Bueller disciples running around these halls. He
jeopardizes my ability to govern this student body.
Grace: He makes you look like an ass.
Rooney: Thank you, but you’re wrong.
Grace: He’s very popular. Sportos, motor-heads, geeks, sluts, bloods, wastoids,
dweebies… they all adore him.
Rooney: That is why I have got to catch him. To show these kids that his example is a first-class ticket
to nowhere.
Grace: Ed! You sounded like Dirty Harry just then.
Rooney: Really? Thanks, Grace.
Mr. Rooney has a real “Go ahead, make my day” attitude regarding young people. Ferris and his youthful associates are intentional about circumventing that at every turn. They get a kick out of it, and every time he over-reacts they are empowered to continue. Then you throw in a personality like Mr. Rooney’s, and you will find that young people will always make sure they are at the opposite end of it regardless of the environment (ex: school, Church, home, extracurricular activities).
Meanwhile, the secretary, Grace, seems to have the capability to get what is going on with the young people. If you were a sporto, motorhead, or geek, who would you choose to confide in — Grace or Mr. Rooney? Kids will confide in the person that they feel “gets them”. The Church needs to “get them”, and relay how parents can get them too. There is no real communication that can take place without that, and youth are certainly not going to be interested in listening to what you have to say, and absorbing it.
For Discussion: How might the Church, while remaining authentic to her truths, convey that they “get” the next generation? Please comment below with your critique clarifications, and responses. <image sources>

Great analogy with the movie quotes! I would turn to Grace in a heartbeat. So, the question for me as an adult leader in the church is, “Am I Grace or am I Mr. Rooney?” I sense that the way the church catechizes makes us all sound like Mr. Rooney’s. I get that. It takes more than a slight shift to change the way we are perceived by youth (and adults for that matter).
Are we being called to re-build our church, our ministries, and re-vision what it means to be Catholic? I believe we are. If we don’t, then we might not have many people left in the pews. I’m not okay with that.
Comment by John Rinaldo — Tuesday, January 22, 2013 @ 4:47 pm